Sunday, July 6, 2014

Surviving and Thriving

I am a survivor of domestic violence. There I said it. Here I am, a survivor, on the other side. A place some never get to.

This last week in Oregon I came face to face with the man who hurt me and put my son in the presence of death. The man I once called my husband. He laughed at me, he was angry at me and now so is his family. Why? Because he can't see Daniel, because he has been in hiding for 12 years, because now he is in jail, because a judge shamed him in front of his new girlfriend. Because he finally got caught after YEARS of running, because they blame me.

If you have recently met me then all of this is a surprise. If you have known me for years, you may know some, maybe most.....but not everything. I have never told everything and I will not. I will not keep reliving the past, I get to move on.

Oddly enough, for everything I went through the only thing that he could be charged and convicted on was felony non payment of child support and failure to appear charges. Which has earned him 3 extraditions, multiple court dates and now finally a jail sentence, a settlement and fines. But hey, I'll take what I can get.

12 years ago I escaped. 12 years ago I moved on. God gave me the strength to leave.

10 years ago Daniel and I met Steve, he showed us what true love is. It doesn't hurt. It doesn't harm those you love. It doesn't make excuses. It doesn't run away from the truth.

My life is good now, its safe, and I am thriving, I am not a victim. I stood before my biggest fear shaking like a leave in the wind, but I did not run. I stood and I spoke and I said it out loud.

Now I move on, a little stronger and a lot wiser. Don't feel sad for me, I am fine. I have often been told that I seem so happy, my life seems perfect, but once upon a time it was a scary place. I don't live there anymore.

So never judge a book by its cover, you don't know from the outside what's written on the pages within.


  1. So proud of you! Thanks for sharing your heart and struggle.

  2. I'm so glad you get to move on. It takes strength and perseverance to get passed the past, and you are blessed with both. ♡